Foster Care to Adoption

One Mother’s Ministry

By Robbi Haynes

Three years ago, Kristina knew there was a ministry God had in mind for her, but she wasn’t clear about what it should be. She was a single mom of two teenagers and felt that somehow God would be able to use her love of kids as the heart of her ministry.

About that time a friend mentioned to her the possibility of becoming a Therapeutic Family Foster Care (TFFC) parent through MBCH Children and Family Ministries (MBCH CFM). After praying about it, Kristina was convinced this would be the ministry God had been preparing her for. She completed the training and licensing process in the St. Louis area and opened her home to children needing a safe, loving foster home. She and her biological children, Jeff and Sydni, felt that a younger child would fit best in their family, so, their first few years as a foster family focused on younger children. They were able to make a difference in the lives of several younger children who were in their home; some for a brief period and some for several months.

During the same time frame, a young teenager named Nicholas had just entered the foster care system as a result of abuse and neglect. He had several placements, some of which were disrupted because of his behavior. Nicholas was a very unhappy young man who was angry and confused by the circumstances of his life.

In January of 2008, when their MBCH CFM worker asked Kristina to consider a 15 year old boy as a placement in their home, she was a little uncertain. Since her focus had been on younger children, she was hesitant about having another teenager in the home. At that time Jeff was eighteen years old and Sydni was seventeen. After meeting Nick, they all felt he would be a good fit for their family, and they were anxious to welcome him.

When Nick arrived in their home he was very reserved and didn’t trust Kristina or her children. Similar to many kids in the foster care system, he was behind in his school work and had some behavioral issues. Nick wasn’t motivated to change his actions or improve his grades and he had no clear goals for his future.

Within just a few weeks after coming to live with Kristina and her family, Nick began to blossom. He began to trust the family and enjoy his life with them. His behavior and school work improved and they all began to feel as if he had been a part of the family forever.

Even though Kristina knew from the outset that the permanency goal for Nick was adoption, she had not considered it as an option. She had felt from the start that God’s intent for her to become a TFFC parent was to provide a temporary home for children. But God had a different plan.

Nick was getting close to the time when he would “age out” of the system. This means that the when the child reaches adulthood, the foster care relationship ends, often with no support or family connections. Kristina didn’t want this to happen to Nick, so she began praying about adopting him. Nick came to live with Kristina and her children in January of 2008 and by September she knew her family should be Nick’s forever family.

God was also working on Kristina’s children. When Kristina approached Jeff and Sydni about the possibility of adopting Nick, they didn’t hesitate. They already considered Nick a brother and wanted him to remain a part of their lives. Kristina’s extended family was thrilled to have a permanent connection with Nick as well.

The adoption was finalized in May, 2009. Nick is now part of a family that will love him and provide him the emotional support and love he will enjoy the rest of his life.

Nick is doing great! He loves sports, is on the honor roll at school and as for long term goals – he plans to go to college and become an engineer.

By being obedient to God and willing to follow His direction, Kristina not only was able to find a rewarding ministry, but another son.

If you would like to find out more about becoming a Therapeutic Family Foster Care family, call MBCH at (800) 264-6224. Training and licensing is provided at no cost and TFFC parents are paid a daily rate for the care of the children.