Six Traits for Healthy Families--Spiritual Well Being
Part Four
How
can we help families understand the importance of spiritual well-being and
building your ‘house’ on the firm foundation of Christ? The importance of
spiritual well-being has been documented through Fantastic Families by
Dr. Nick and Nancy Stinnett and Joe and Alice Beam. It is trait five of six
traits that help build strong, healthy families. The importance of spiritual
well-being is also found throughout the Old
and New Testament. “For the promise is to you and to your children and to all that are
far off, everyone whom the Lord our God calls to Himself.” (Acts 2:39) “And
these words which I command you this day shall be upon your heart; and you
shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you
sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and
when you rise.” (Deut. 6:6-7) “Father’s
do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and
instruction of the Lord.” (Eph.
6:4) So, you want to help
your family in this area? Where do you begin?
Make
sure you have a good relationship with the Lord! You can’t help your
husband, wife, children, or grandchildren if you are far from God. Your
relationship with the Lord important! He loves you! He suffered in your place!
He died for you! He wants you to have an abundant life. And, He rose from the
dead so that you will have eternal life with Him. Recognize and admit that you
are not perfect. Christ is the perfect one. Look to the Lord for forgiveness.
Confess your sins, make prayer a priority, enjoy Christian fellowship, study
God’s Word, and attend worship services regularly.
Be
concerned about the spiritual well-being of each member of your family.
Pray daily for each member. Ask the Lord to help them grow in God’s grace.
Encourage them to rely upon God. Help them understand that they are saved by
faith (Eph. 2:8,9), not by their good
works. Live your faith in the home. Forgive each other as Christ has forgiven
you. And attend church and Sunday school together.
Recently I interviewed Dr. Dick
Hardel on a Family Shield radio
program. We discussed “Growing Healthy Christian Families.” As the former
president of the Youth and Family Institute and a popular author, his career
has focused on helping parents and church leaders learn to nurture and grow
faith in the home. I asked, “What can we do to help parents and families pass
on faith to the next generation?” He shared the importance of implementing the
Four Keys for Nurturing Faith in the Home. They include: 1) Caring Conversations,
2) Family Devotions, 3) Family Service Projects; and 4) Family Rituals and
Traditions.
Caring Conversations
Caring conversations
involve having children and family members overhear us talking about God in our
daily life and talking together about God and faith. Dick shared an example, “I
was at my daughter’s and my four and half year old granddaughter asked, ‘Now,
grandpa, the angels helped Jesus when He was in the Garden, didn’t they? What
else do angels do, grandpa?’ I responded, What a good question! You have
obviously heard your parents having a conversation about this topic. Let’s take
a walk and talk about angels some more.”
Remind
parents that they don’t have to have all the answers. Just talk with your
children and help them see that the Lord is important.
When
caring conversations are a normal part of family life, God’s presence is felt
in the home. That’s faith talk. Youth and Family Institute produces many
excellent resources that can help families talk about their faith. One is
called Faith Talk with Children. Information about this and other
resources is available at www.youthandfamilyinstitute.org.
Family
Devotions
Family devotions are also important.
Many Christian families don’t ever have devotions. Some don’t know how. Others
have tried devotions and found them difficult. Hardel shared, “Families and
family devotions can be messy. That is life! Life can be messy. So if little
Jimmy runs and jumps during devotions and doesn’t seem to listen, that’s OK. In
the middle of our messy devotions God is with us! Congregations must come along
side parents and teach them how to have a devotional life in the home.”
Another
resource that can help families implement devotions in the home is the Youth
and Family Institute Faith Chest. Directions for this wooden chest are on the
website. The chest is intended to hold important paperwork and items related to
our faith. But, the chest can also be used as a family worship center. Use it
as the home altar. Place the Bible, candles and a colorful scarf on it. Create
holy moments. Devotions should be short and age appropriate. Read a Bible story or a devotional. Act out a Bible story together. Confess your sins
to one another and offer forgiveness to each other. Teach your family how to
pray. Use a prayer from God’s Word like the Lord’s
Prayer and memorize a Bible verse
together.
Family
Service Projects
Family service involves the entire
family doing an activity of service to say “thank you” to God. As we do family
service activities we are living out our faith by doing acts of kindness for
others. Do something together once a month. It doesn’t need to be a major
project, simple projects are best.
What
are some family service ideas and who can you help? Shovel snow for an elderly
neighbor and pray for her. Travel to grandma’s and help with home repair
projects and, pray as a family for those you serve. Cut your neighbor’s grass
while they are on vacation and pray for them. Make a pot of soup together as a
family, make a card, then deliver everything together. And pray with them. Some
churches organize family service projects. This is another great opportunity
for family service.
Family Rituals and Traditions
Family
rituals and traditions help show children what and who is important to you.
They define who you are. In What is a Family? by Edith Scheffer the
author talks about the home being a “Museum of Memories.” The concept is that a
museum has a selection of things worth preserving. A family is to be a museum
of memories—collections of carefully preserved memories. She suggests that
someone in the family needs to be conscious of the fact that memories are
important so they plan memories just as someone might plan a museum. This
involves taking lots of pictures and organizing them. Remember that what you do
today will become tomorrow’s memories and traditions!
Some
years ago I presented “Family Traditions for the Home” for a Mother of
Preschoolers (MOPS) group. As I prepared the program, I asked my three grown
children to share their favorite family memory. One shared the following; “Mom
would let one of the children choose the entire menu for no particular
occasion. Sometimes it was a birthday or another special day, but most of the
time it was just an ordinary day. It made us feel great!”
Holidays,
special times and family gatherings rituals and traditions that related to the
fall months are great and may include raking leaves and then rolling in them,
carving a pumpkin together, roasting hot dogs in the fireplace and eating them
on the floor together at grandma’s, going on camping trips, and going on a
hayride, then having hot chocolate and s’mores afterwards.
As
we build our home on the firm foundation of Jesus Christ we will find purpose
for living, freedom and peace, a confident outlook, receive support from
like-minded Christians within our congregation and access to the power of God.
Join
us next month as I complete the series on the six traits that build healthy,
strong families--helping them deal with stress and crisis.
Kay L. Meyer is
the president of Family Shield Ministries, host of its radio program, and a
popular Christian author and speaker. The Family Shield radio program can be heard on AM 850 KFUO on
Saturdays at 11:05 a.m. and Sundays at 7:05 p.m. in St. Louis. It is also heard
in nine other states. To contact Meyer email her at KLMeyer@worldnet.att.net,
visit her website at www.familyshieldministries.com or call (314) 772-6070. To receive a complimentary booklet entitled: Now You’re Talking—Practical
Ways to Effectively Manage Conflict,
call the Family Shield’s Response Center toll-free at 1-877-317-4316.
